On This Episode of the Empathy Podcast, we’re thrilled to feature Bari Lyman, a transformative dating and relationship coach and founder of “Meet to Marry.” With over 20 years of marriage experience and a thriving relationship counseling career, Bari is dedicated to helping people find authentic love and build conscious relationships. In this powerful episode, Bari shares her unique journey, from struggling to find love herself to creating the “Clear Path to True Healthy Love” program. This episode dives into the principles behind her method, including removing emotional blocks, cultivating empathy, and building relationships rooted in shared values.
Highlights from the Conversation
1. Bari’s Journey to Finding Love
Bari’s story resonates with anyone who’s experienced the ups and downs of the dating world. For many years, she struggled with finding a meaningful connection, attracting the wrong types of partners and feeling stuck in patterns of unfulfilling relationships. However, she eventually met her soulmate, and they have now been married for two decades, sharing a compassionate, vegan lifestyle with their five rescue dogs. Through this experience, Bari discovered the blocks that had held her back in love and began designing her method to help others overcome similar obstacles.
“We all think we should just know how to do love,” Bari shares. “But love requires the same kind of learning, intention, and guidance as any other important area of life.”
2. Overcoming Emotional Blocks
One of Bari’s primary goals with her clients is to help them identify and clear the “conscious and unconscious dating and relationship blocks” that many people carry. These blocks, often rooted in past trauma, negative beliefs, and societal conditioning, keep people from attracting the love they truly desire. According to Bari, our upbringing, early relationships, and social conditioning all impact our romantic lives, often in ways we don’t realize. Her approach focuses on breaking these patterns so clients can date from a place of self-awareness and openness.
3. Conscious Relationships: A Path to Lasting Love
For Bari, a conscious relationship involves empathy, intentionality, and a shared commitment to growth. She explains that true love is found when both partners have done the inner work to clear away the blocks of the past. Only then can they build a relationship based on mutual respect, shared values, and emotional maturity.
“A healthy relationship is made up of two people who are not operating from their past traumas, but from a place of self-awareness and empathy,” Bari explains. “When you’re both conscious in a relationship, you’re not thinking ‘me, me, me’ – it’s all about ‘we’.”
4. Keys to a Strong, Long-Term Relationship
Bari shares that a conscious, long-lasting partnership is built on several core values: empathy, communication, shared vision, and rituals that strengthen the relationship over time. A significant part of her program includes helping people identify their core values and goals, which will guide them in creating a shared life vision with their partner. She emphasizes that relationships are about working together as a team, continually supporting each other, and creating a life that reflects both partners’ values.
In her own marriage, Bari and her husband share a strong foundation of adventure, compassion, and growth. They’ve embarked on unique experiences together, like moving to Israel and living a vegan lifestyle, which reinforce their connection and commitment to shared ideals.
5. The Role of Empathy and Compassion in Love
Empathy is a central theme in Bari’s teachings. She believes that empathy – the ability to truly understand and feel compassion for another person – is the bedrock of a healthy, loving relationship. It’s about creating space to communicate openly, prioritizing the other person’s well-being as much as one’s own, and nurturing a relationship built on shared empathy. Empathy also extends beyond the romantic partnership; Bari discusses her vegan lifestyle and commitment to compassion toward all living beings, which plays a role in how she and her husband connect on a deeper level.
6. The Importance of Shared Values and Conscious Choices
Bari points out that many couples get together due to chemistry alone, without evaluating whether their values, visions, or goals align. She encourages people to get clear on what they truly want in a partner and to prioritize relationships that reflect their own values. For Bari and her husband, shared values around compassion, empathy, and a plant-based lifestyle have reinforced their bond and given them a meaningful way to spend time together.
7. Practical Tips for Those Seeking Love
Here are some takeaways from Bari’s conversation on how to approach dating with intentionality:
- Be clear about your values and goals: Know what truly matters to you, and look for a partner who shares those core values.
- Don’t be afraid to ask deep questions: Don’t settle for small talk. Have real conversations early on to find out if your visions for life align.
- Clear out emotional baggage: If you’re holding onto past trauma or projecting old patterns onto new relationships, work on these areas first. A healthy relationship is one where you’re free from these blocks.
- Embrace vulnerability: Bari emphasizes that vulnerability is essential for true intimacy. Showing your authentic self allows for a genuine connection, rather than a superficial or guarded one.
- Look for someone willing to grow: In her program, Bari teaches her clients that conscious love involves lifelong growth. Look for a partner who’s open to learning, changing, and growing alongside you.
8. Building Empathy and Compassion in a Romantic Relationship
Bari believes that empathy, coupled with compassion, is the secret ingredient to a successful and long-lasting relationship. She encourages her clients to practice empathy as an ongoing, intentional choice – to see life from their partner’s perspective, share in each other’s challenges and triumphs, and actively work to nurture an environment of mutual support and understanding.
Final Thoughts: Redefining Love and Relationships
Bari’s approach to love is transformative and provides a fresh perspective on what it means to have a truly conscious relationship. Her method is about far more than simply finding a partner; it’s about creating a life that’s deeply fulfilling, empathetic, and aligned with your highest values. Bari’s program helps people connect with themselves, so they can attract relationships that reflect the love and compassion they have cultivated within.
If you’re interested in conscious relationships or are ready to break free from patterns of unfulfilling dating, Bari’s insights from this episode may inspire you to take the first steps toward intentional, purposeful love. For those looking to learn more, be sure to listen to Episode 10 of the Empathy Podcast and explore Bari’s Clear Path to True Healthy Love.
Bari Lyman Website : www.meettomarry.com
